RutLove

The things in my life that have sort of set themselves up in a rut and have been preying on my persevering soul. I work for my father, and his business is small so my tasks are mundane, I want for something more challenging but I fear it is out of my reach. Why do I not try, the convenience is nice about not having to worry about calling out sick, and taking time off. I have been offered positions but some not as convenient as that. I suppose I've been scared. Either way it's time to move on, I don't know what the future holds, but I signed on to a on call banquet serving position. I waited tables for two years and I loved every bit of it. When I graduate and own my own restaurant, although I will create the menu, I will work in the front of the house and greet as many customers as I can. My baby and I are going to run the place, I used to watch the show Fawtly Towers or BBC America, and I want my place to be like that except we'd get along better.
I suppose I am constantly living in the future though. It is sad but I'm constantly wanting for the life in the future and not really living my time and enjoying it. I also tend to live in the past a bit. Knowing the problem is the first step i guess.

I'm happy about my girlfriend who actually pushes me to become who I need to be and gives me hope that there is a good humanity out there somewhere. OH, and not to mention restores my hope that you can find your soul mate, the one that makes you happier than you've ever been. That just literally makes you whole. I should try to be more like her in that she lives in the now, and still has goals and is diligently working toward her future, and excelling at it. I admire and respect her so much for that and I really look up to her.

In conclusion I will be more harsh when it comes remembering to live in the moment and enjoy knowing that you should always be happy but never satisfied. Knowing something better is coming. I can't wait to spend that time, and that future with my best friend. I'll enjoy her and take tips on living now.

Life has so much ahead... I can't wait!!!!

When My World Became Right!!!

The best day of my life was 2 years and six days ago. That was the day the love of my life accepted my request for her to spend time with me as my girlfriend. My inhibitions were blown away that someone could give me a chance, but she did. As the relationship progressed I fell in love with her, she fell quite fast and was able to say the dreaded "l" word. Later I realized that she was the most amazing person I'd ever met. She is my world. Every flaw that I might have she is willing to help me overcome. We have amazing times together and what's best of all she's very inteligent and we're able to have the best conversations.
Three months ago her parents moved to Ohio and I was fully prepared to leave everything behind and move to go to school and be with her. To start a life with her. She then decided she hates the cold and is willing to move back to sunny Florida. I couldn't be more thrilled. We had a two year marker pass on 11/15/08, and I flew up to be with her and spend an amazing five days. During that time I became so close with her I'm realizing I want nothing but to marry this girl and start a family with her. She makes me so happy and her being as fragile as she can be some time, I'm prepared to be by her side for every bump and every hardship that may come into either of our lives.
In conclusion I think that that I must look within myself to find any problem or fallacy in myself that would hinder my future with her. I have many problems, impulsiveness, anger issues, etc... I could go on, either way. I'm willing to do whatever it takes to make her happy for the rest of her life and I can't wait to grow old with her and make beautiful, gorgeous, green eyed, Cuban, Jewish babies!!!!